Saturday September 30
“You host Ted”
Aka, this was a disaster.
List of performers:
- Tux guy
- Anthony fiorelli
- amy sarah
- bridget Thomas
- Emily bowling
- gregg brown
- Robbie bersano
- dave ruthenberg
- Keith Habersberger
Underlines denote ted virgins.
Approximate running time:
What felt like an eternity
Number of Pieces:
Know this, any misspellings or lack of capilowlisations
are things I don’t care about. Also bad grammer.
Also, know this, tonight, ted was hosted by a series of
volunteers. They all took the notes, and I wrote verbatim what was in my
notebook. I am so sorry.
Here goes nothing.
Tonight… this evening at ted, we are fortunate enough to finally
have ted. Talent is epitomized in the random guest host of everyone host ted.
Keith has opened with a pitiful explanation of why his ted lacks a theme.
Although lame at best, upon tommy’s 10 out of 12 the audience kindly graciously
accepts his proposal.
As audience members eagerly… no wait… viciously proceed to
keith, we begin with… enthusiastic applause.
- tux guy, one and only, new
- what are you thinking? shee
and elmer, apparently CJ tour is hairy, hairy CJ equals abe Lincoln
(uncanny) OMG. Abe Lincoln sketch. Cj’s mom said “we should have Abe as
prez because then someone he sent in office. Cant wait to see more.
- Anthony fiorelli. He decided
to write a poem called “cheers” I hope its about the TV show. We don’t
hear much anymore about shelly long, she was Dianne from cheers. She was
also in the money pit by tom hanks. I just recently watched tom Hank’s
movie Philadelphia on TV. It’s a good movie with a strong message about
aids. Does magic Johnson still have aids? I really liked that mad TV
sketch. Well Anthony just yelled blood. That’s like the shining, what a
good connection. Anthony and the shining.
- broken G string. I taught
them guitar. Evidently it was traumatizing. “nice host notes brie”
Bangles out of the way. dare to suck nominee
(written in by someone else)
- so Mr. asks everyone to jam
decided to… ask everyone to jam. The ted audience is thoroughly excited.
Doing a soulful tribal piece he started his ted performance using the drum
as his constant steady rythem. The audience found themselves in a
- Robbie decided he wanted sing.
From a eeup song from a cd he had a neat Charleston dance – sucet
dance wows everyone 6e6 wasu + hese should be sad. Heiy missed it.
- parte t abe Lincoln or linkin
is really gay. But mary todd (crazy bitch) doesn’t believe him and
convinces her that she is in fact a crazy bitch.
- dave ruthenberg. Fully
bearded man talks on about jelly beans while I waited to go back in my
acoma because he was so boring yet he humored me and got others to laugh.
And yet he still talked about beans. Because he obysess with beans and
people who eat them in pews. Eat me eat me now. big beans small beans,
he talked about. Then all as he clenched his fists and standing a new era
of bean eras with a small bean that he spee he wondered if he would be in
trouble for aiding and abetting this bean even though he contemplated why
he died. Why wasn’t he born a licorish.
- part 3 – Lincoln. Four
square and seven years ago, the end.
- paul takes up several minutes
of time unloading his pockets of random as crap as he proceeds to pull
random as crap, if skittles from his pocket he elaborates on his pockets
and how they are a magical bag of tricks… without further ado his stow.
Walmart story. ą slowly took
his clothes off for some reason. Sweat jazz herds at the euel. so we go
to walmart we hit up the act he section yes! There is no way this sweat
die thte box will pit in the tn. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I got bored.
- abe Lincoln is a massive
slave. Part 4 of abe blinkin began to commence the announce was lurched
into the world of sweet raphsody as a tuor as ave dancer acrossed ted’s
dance floor the began to awkwardly molest his fellow scene partner. The
lights added an additional seizure effect to the scene as the music
abruptly ended the scene.
- something about candy.
Cinnamon roll baked in hell furnace
- Robbie Robbie Robbie.
Hamburgaler party, oh roetry
- dear mitch – Apples?
Really? Cool? Question mark? A whole sketch on apples? I commend you.
no singing though – don’t quit your day job, of being mitch. Love,
- good idea : kill more cats
NOTES! AJ LOVES KEITH. Cjs
performing and shee’s getting naked.
Joan and cleo and cj wont go to
prom. Joan and cleo are LEZZIES joan licks CJ for some reason. I failed my
Spanish test Friday (AJ) fidel castro (JFK) isnt wearing a shirt. JFK is
wants el naked
CJ aks like a man and kicksufk out
CJ’s confused called joan
something. He’s dating joan. What happened to shee? Will jfk become a
stripper? Will there be racism?
17. pizza party.
1. Tux guy – one and only
2. CJ, shee, and someone else -
3. Anthony fiorelli – a poem
4. broken G string quartet
5. gregg brown – songs
6. part 1
7. Robbie bersano – emo
8. part 2
9. dave ruthenberg – a true
10. part 3
11. paul – whatever
12. part 4
13. keith smelling
14. mitch - test run
15. lisa, chris, bill, tom –
16. 60 seconds of pizza
17. part 5
These awards are based off the notes for the pieces.
If they were good notes, it was a good piece, and so on.
Notes of the week:
AJ’s notes on Cj’s lincon piece
Dare to Suck at writing notes Award:
The notes on Fiorelli’s piece
Notes 6. and 10.
Super secret Hidden Theme*:
I’ll never do this again.
are the unintentional repetition of something throughout the TED of that week.