Theatre of


Saturday, January 28th 2006

“Artistic History!”



List of performers:

Rob Colletti

Ryan Bennett

Pete Tenuto

CJ Tuor

Mike (Send me your last name and I’ll add it)


Andrew Higgins

Kevin Hadsell

The Chad

Jeff Hellenthal

Craig Sadur

Keith Habersberger

Chris Bogue

Mike Norris

Mikey Laird



Approximate Running Time:

1 hour and 25 minutes


Number of Pieces:







Host Notes:

            The first Theatre of Ted of 2006 started off with an amazing dramatic performance by two incredibly serious performers. We heard that ISU was putting on a Shakespeare show this semester and we thought we’d do our audition piece at Ted. We thought since Shakespeare was in verse that it was a good idea to do a scene in vers to show that we can handle the difficult language. We decided to bring Dr. Seuss’s Green Eggs and Ham to life in an amazing dramatic exploration. It’s hard to put into words exactly what occurred this night at Ted, but I can say that Art descended upon all of us and then slapped us in the face with it’s mighty hand of awesomeness. I then declared that tonight we’d witness Artistic History!


            The first act of the evening was Old Peoria. These guys are all Ted regulars who have played with multiple groups, but it was nice to see this group together. It was a totally different turn for two members of the amazing trifecta of fun known as Wingus when they joined Rob Colletti on stage to perform a cover of “If I had a Million Dollars” and then they launched into an original song that was sweet and funny as well. I don’t know the name of it, but it was quite good and the chorus had the memorable line “I won’t remember who you are unless I take you home.” I’ve been there before ;). Can’t wait to see what these guys come up with in the future.

The second piece Jeff Helenthal performing a really cool dance piece entitled “America”. He had all sorts of phrases written on his body and from where I was sitting, I couldn’t really get a good look at them, hopefully Pete captured some of them in some pictures or I guess it will always be a mystery. Jeff’s dance had a lot of very harsh, calculated movements that really seemed violent and showed his frustration with whatever he had written on his body. Great piece.

After that, Keith and Commadore (Mike Norris) did a spoken-word version of “Baby It’s Cold Outside”. This song’s lyrics always seemed a little odd to me, but now after seeing these two gentlemen perform it, I will never ever be able to enjoy the song as a sweet Christmas song ever again. Damn you both.

Then CJ and Mike told the Ted audience that they hit a road block in the creation of their new show: they need a female cast member. After losing their other female cast menmnbers they thought it would be a good idea to take the audience of Ted out on a “date” with them so that the females in the audience got to know them better and hopefully these females might like to be in their show. CJ made me cringe when after discovering he forgot the food for their picnic he said, “We’ll just have to feast on your beauty.” Ugh…. What a line. All in all, this was a very creative way to plug their new show and ask for help at the same time. Another solid piece!

Next up is Marc’s favorite performer: Pete Tenuto. He serenaded us all with covers of Semisonic and Third Eye Blind. He certainly has a knack for picking obscure songs from formerly popular bands. Always a way to keep things interesting.

After that, Keith and Chris came in with a piece called “All sorts of new Humor”. This piece consisted of Keith playing the French Horn in various physical positions while Chris would hold up posters with phrases or drawings on them, Keith would sometimes stop his playing to tell a joke or make an observation such as “I think pimples are like pimps that pimp my face out to dirt and oil.” Chris then held up a sign that read “My face is not a brothel.” This piece cracked Marc and I up.

Craig and Andrew were up next with “Crappy Blues”. These blues were crappy, but they made me laugh a lot, so I enjoyed them anyway. I’ll always remember Craig crooning out the line “Bitch gave me crabs.” That will be burned in my brain forever. Thank you Craig.

After that, Ian played “I Once Had a Girl” by the Beatles and sang too. He did a great job of getting out there and testing his talents in front of a crowd. I hope he comes back again and hones his skills into becoming a polished, machine of awesomeness that dispenses musical godliness at his own discretion.

The next piece was Andrew with YAY/Boo! This piece was a philosophical attack on the English Language. I was so caught offguard by his amazing analysis and observations that I could not challenge nor agree with him. I was also surprised that he was so profound seeing that only 10 minutes ago, he played harmonica while Craig sang “Bitch gave me crabs.”

The tenth piece of the night was Kevin Hadsell with a Brief Interlude. My notes for this piece are as follows: Neato effects on his own amp + talent on the guitar = A good time. This piece made me think of being on mushrooms. I felt sound.

Finally The Chad brought an unknown audience member, Eddie, to the stage to pick a number between 1 and 3. Eddie picked 2 and Chad then read “The Geek Wants Out” to the audience’s delight. Hooray!


Performance pieces:

Old Peoria with 2 songs

Jeff Helenthal with “America”

Keith and Commadore with “Baby it’s Cold Outside”

CJ and Mike with “Fried Green Tomatoes”

Pete Tenuto with 2 songs

Craig Sadur and Andrew Higgins with “Crappy Blues”

Ian with a Song on Guitar

Andrew Higgins with “YAY/BOO”

Keith Habersberger & Chris Bogue with “New Sorts of Humor”

Kevin Hadsell with “Brief Interlude”

The Chad with “The Geek Wants Out”






Piece(s) of the week:

Keith Habersberger & Chris Bogue with “New Sorts of Humor”

Dare to Suck Award:

Ian with a Song on Guitar

Jaw dropper:

The amazingly disturbing lyrics of “Baby It’s Cold Outside”


Super Secret Theme: People appearing in more than one piece tonight.


*hidden themes are the unintentional repetition of something throughout the TED of that week.