Theatre of


Saturday, October 22nd 2005

“Theatre of Taft!”



List of performers:


Pete Guither

Ross Frawley

Jared Winkler

Matt Herzau

Nicole Dieker

Matt Kerrigan

Craig Sadur

Jordan Holloway

Evan Wesselman


The Chad

Adam Tucker

Keith Habersberger

Matt Richert




Approximate Running Time:

2 hours and 7minutes


Number of Pieces:




165 people 


Host Notes:

            Tonight we decided to honor one of our greatest lesser-known Presidents of the United States: William Howard Taft! Although, President Taft is dead, we got the most dedicated William Howard Taft impersonator alive today, Nick Mikula! He spent the whole show in Taft’s signature bathtub (Taft was such a large man that they had to replace the bathtub in the White House with a tub that could fit 4 men). The whole night would be in honor of Taft and educating everyone about the achievements of William Howard Taft.


            Our first piece in honor of “The Taft” was performed by Bainbridge. They had another perplexing piece that was sound infused and under a self-imposed time limit of 15 minutes. I don’t exactly know what the piece was about, but I think there’s a good debate about it on the message boards so check it out there, so I’ll just tell you some of the crazy visuals that I saw. There was a guy that was in all white and had a soccer ball for a head and was cooking grilled cheese on an electric pan. Bainbridge put on a hat that resembled the top of a cat’s head and he shaved it. There was a construction worker that would remind them of the amount of time left in the piece. There was the sound of a baby crying being played constantly throughout the piece. One time a guy spit his gum in what I thought was pickle juice? There was also a floppy automatic vibrator-thingy. The music that underscored the piece started out as ominous but then transitioned to country and then a phone ringing. This piece was obviously about how Americanization of great things such as sports, grilled cheese, and pickle juice is oppressive to the floppy vibrator-machines of the world.

Our second piece was The Chad giving away Rocky Horror Tickets. There was a girl named Amanda who seemed to know all of the songs and did a great job singing “Time Warp” and “Sweet Transvestite”. CJ also did a beat poetry version of “Late Night Double Feature”.

After that, Pete had a piece called “Cat’s in the Cradle”. Since tonight also happened to be parent’s weekend at ISU, some parents attended Ted tonight. Pete invited them to come on stage and tell an embarrassing story about their child. Angela Wascher’s mom talked about how she suspected Angela of having thrown a party while she was gone. She thought Angela and her friends had been drinking too. Angela said it was her “friend” who did it all and that she would give her mother his phone number so that she could set him straight. Mrs. Wascher called that boy and gave him the business. What shed did not know at the time was that the boy was actually a friend of Angela’s who pretended to be the real friend and fooled her mother. My parents were also in attendance and they told some story about me that might be construed as embarrassing. But, I guess you had to be there…

Ross and Jared were up next directing a scene. They took volunteers (Kasia & Steve Brackett) and had them read sides. Things got a little steamy when they decided to “raise the stakes” by performing several different sexual positions and then going even beyond that to invent their own while performing the scene. I loved the photos of this one.

Nicole Dieker stopped by to plug her show Springtime. Nice to see an MFA director come by. Hopefully someday we’ll see an MFA perform again.

Merry and Piven then performed the greatest and craziest jam session I have ever seen at Ted. They had somewhere in the range of 23-57 guitar pedals and I think they used about 32 of them. It was quite cool.

After the explosion of awesome was our good friend Matt “Tinz” Herzau with 2 songs. He performed “Still Fighting It” by Ben Folds and an original song with a great hook “Every song that reminds you of him reminds me of you.” So sad, but very good.

After this Keith and Matt started out with this suspenseful music where Keith started to count down from 5 and got to 0 and he kept going! He went to -5! The song was about integers and it was awesome. They also performed another great song about Princess Peach from Mario’s perspective. They also performed a song about being a “Ghetto Jew”. These guys just keep cranking out hilarious stuff.

Matt Kerrigan made solo performance debut with his serenade of Mrs. Wascher. He sang “I like Big Butts” by Sir Mix-A-Lot to her while he kind of tried to seduce her. It was quite disturbing, but fun to see that she was a good sport and played along.

Next was the return of “Randomly Pegasus” Craig then went on one of his fantastic random rants. My favorite was “Last year I put bugs in a bottle and named them Tommy.” Craig then sang a song about the Fonz. I wish we could’ve hearsd more of it, but I did catch the chorus which was “Hey Richie, let’s go out and cause some mischief.” Awesome.

Evan Wesselman made his return to the Ted stage to perform the Beer Poem. I didn’t learn anything, but I was amazed at his capacity to retain this type of information. He had it committed to memory! Wow.

Kevin then graced us with a nice little story that was about him riding his bike and he rode it into wet cement. The mason that was working on the cement exclaimed “I can’t f*cking believe it!” For those who were concerned, the bike survived the incident with only some gray dust and a crunching sound every time he peddled the bike.

The Chad was up next with a piece from “the book” that was about God and Jesus at family counseling. It was really interesting and quite a cool piece. So cool, that I forgot to write anything down.

Evan Wesselman came back with “The Rules”, a piece with rules for girls dating guys. I honestly don’t remember a whole lot about this piece, but I think I’ve seen it in one of those humorous emails that people forward to each other.

The final piece of the night was Craig and The Chad with a Conversation from Craig’s Life. This was a debate about the nerdliest of subjects: a debate about the Ents in Lord of the Rings. The basic conclusion was that Craig is a Geek.

I’d like to thank all of the parents that came to Ted to show support for their kids and their friends. It was really cool to see more and more parents encouraging their kids to pursue what they love. I know that I am incredibly thankful that my parents and GRANDPARENTS came and sat through the whole show. I am incredibly blessed to have such wonderful people and I hope that more people bring their parents next year so that we can hear all of the ridiculous stories their parents have about them.


Performance pieces:

Bainbridge with “?”

Pete Guither with “Cat’s in the Cradle”

Ross and Jared with a “Directing Scene”

Nicole Dieker with “Please come see Springtime

Merry and Piven with “Deloused in the Tedatorium”

Matt Herzau with “Rock for the Ages!”

Keith Habersberger and Matt Richert with “2 ½ Songs”

Matt Kerrigan with “Serinade”

Craig Sadur and Jordan with “Randomly Pegasus”

Evan Wesselman with “The Beer Poem”

Kevin with “Story of my life”

The Chad with “Something from the Book”

Evan Wesselman with “The Rules”

Craig and The Chad with “Geekness”






Piece(s) of the week:

Keith and Matt with “2 ½ songs” – INTEGERS!

Merry and Piven’s amazing jam session


Dare to Suck Award:

Kevin with “My Life Story”


Jaw dropper:

Angela’s mom grabbing Matt Kerigan during his serenade – wow.

 Kasia and Steve Brackett.


Super Secret Theme: A series of pieces that made my Grandparents more and more uncomfortable as the night went on. – That was so hilarious. I can’t believe they sat through the whole thing!


*hidden themes are the unintentional repetition of something throughout the TED of that week.