Theatre of TED

April 27, 2002



List of performers


                     Dan Huffines              Adam Rosowicz         Pete Guither

                     Matt Russell              Enrico Natale             Ricky Rodriguez

                     Brian Clouthier           Mike Schmeck Dan Radcliff

                     Jenny Sukin               Shawn ______ Jason Wrobeleski

                     Nick Izzo                   Mark Hackman Betsy Beams

                     Maren Brucker Johnathan Grabb         Nick Lamb

                     Shannon                    Keith Nadal               Chris Weise

                     Dr. Cheese                 Mike Nulicek             Tom Pleviak

                     Megan Dale               Cassidy Browning      Cassie Vlohos

                     Coutrney Rioux         


(Italics denotes a new performer at TED)


28 performers this week in what turned out to be nothing short of a complete Ted.


Total Attendance


Attendance at the April 27 Theatre of Ted was 92 people.




Notes from TED


“Theatre of Ted, Enthusiastic Applause”


Disclaimer: The following is purely a skit and is no way meant to be construde as a reality or as any disrespect towards any of the charcters being depicted:


"And now welcome to Faculty Jeopardy"


faculty Jeopardy got started off with the introduction of the evening participants: First was Mr. Jack McLaughlin-Gray: Jesus Christ!! Second was Lori Adams: NO!! Go Away!! And our final participant of the evening was Mr. Patrick O'gara…Wait a minute, Patrick wasn't feeling well and has cancelled his appearance on todays show…..Wait another minute here is Patrick: I'm sorry, I'm late, I wasn't feeling well. Jeopardy got under way with such categories as : Potpourri, Student in your classes, Guideposts, Potent potables, Liquor, Famous faces and of course, Biblical History…..All in all the entire episode of faculty jeopardy was highly entertaining and got a great crowd response in kicking off this, the final night of Ted. Any jokes that were made were done so in jest and to be looked upon as a roast. All have a great deal of respect for our faculty and were having a little fun with some of our favorite instructors.


The 3 Ft. Gator Players started their highly involved night at Ted with A Lesson. Here Enrico came in as a professor(?) of some sorts, and with the help of 2 lovely assistants helped to diagram the mystery of A$$ & T1TT1E$$….Schmeuck and Clouthier in drag, who could ask for anything more?


Nick Izzo made his Ted return as Professor Johanson…The good professor talked about The Key and what it means to student who search for it. As the professor talked it became apparent that he himself didn't quite believe in what he preached and it became even more evident as he became increasingly neurotic…even needing a drink, and getting nearly completely naked. Nick, I mean Professor Johanson was able to gain composure and finish his lecture: in his boxers…(I really thought he was going to get naked…but hey, that's just me).


Mark Hackman felt compelled to offer an apology. It seems that the clock in the airport lounge that has stood for some time belonged to him. I mean hey, hey bought it after all. He felt compelled to after the old one wasn't replaced a couple of years ago. The apology part was not in reference to buying the clock (of course not), but instead for what he was going to do to the clock. During finals week he was going to take it and smash the hell out of it to symbolize the end of his own dependence of having to "go by the clock." The Clock: Telling him when he had to go to rehearsal, when he had to go to class, etc….

(Follow up note: The clock has been replaced--with a black one too!! The reason for the host notes being so late is because I wanted to see if someone would get one up…yeah, that's the ticket…..and if you'll buy that I have some ocean front property in Arizona that I'd love to sell you!!)


Betsy Beams had a Public Service Announcement that told of the 4-square marathon to come (Which has now passed…gee, these did take a long time to get up…Damn dog, I'm sorry) Her announcement was also included a group hug from all the short people in the room.


Shinedo mashed Potato was…well, in a word, awesome!! It was a dance piece set to various types of music that (without words, ala Kid A) told the story of Oedipus Rex. It showed the story from the infant days of Oedipus and his growing up and the rest of the traditional story. A play by play detail cannot do justice here, it was an overall delight and was great to see what a group can do at Ted. Simply a delight.


3 Ft. Gator Players--Things you should never do…EVER!! (Part 1) You should never walk into a room, and in a warm affectionate greeting to your mother give her a smack on the behind.


Matt Enrico debuted their first Silent scene of the evening. It involved a blind man watching TV and the alien who comes in while the blind man is using the bathroom and proceeds to hide the remote.


Maren shared with us a story from her own writings and before she did said that it was "Exceptionally Brilliant"--to quote the aspiring great one. What she told was a Story of Truth and told how many of us are "Always in anticipation and never in contentment & satisfaction." Great delve into her thoughts and nice to see this type of piece at Ted.


Pete Guither then presented a slide show of the Living Canavas. You can visit the Living Canvas on line at …I suggest you check it out. And also, there will be performances this summer, be on the lookout for more information soon!! The slide show was set to music and lasted about 13 minutes. For those not familiar with The Living Canvas it was a great introduction and showed some of the ways that the human body can be used.


And now we all found out What Really Happened to Walt Disney….Disney (Chris Weise) appeared in what seemed to be a British accent, and told of his ideas of world domination, but was cut short with the return of Archie Nun. The two found dagger and rapier style and what turned out to be a good display of action and story telling. (Note: The fight sequence was a precursor to the fight final from the their (Keith and Chris) final in Paul's class. I had the opportunity to sit in and watch the final, both did a great job with their scene).


3 Ft. Gator Players--Things you should never do…EVER!! (Part 2)--You should never, EVER walk into a room and walk to your friend and sniff his crotch….NEVER!!! Agreed? AGREED!!


Shawn and jenny reprised their piece from last week, but with a different twist. This one was entitled The 15 dumbest things that girls say. The list was told more by Shawn on this go around and some of the items were not unanimous, but still enough of them were to the crowd into it. Jenny and Shawn have been good editions to the Ted family as of late, with creative and entertaining pieces.


Dr. Cheese played a song entitled: Can't say Sperm in Church…..I'll let you all try and figure out what this one was about.


3 Ft. Gator Players--Things you should never do…EVER!! (Part 3)---You should never….EVER, bring up, at your friends wedding what he said about his wife before they were to get married……NEVER!!


Matt & Enrico's second silent scene of the evening was two wrestler going at it in the ring when one (Enrico) had the other (Matt) pinned by straddling him and holding him, down. During the struggle, some affection crew and the two began (or at least teased) making out. And Scene!


Honduran Ophelia returned to Ted Back & Better than ever!! This time they kept their clothes on to the delight of the audience and performed an improv insult song where Dan Radcliff introduced some of his favorite insults to people. He had some really good ones and I thought I was gonna get a bad one towards the end of the song. Instead, he ended with a "Thank you" for Ted being back, and even though I feel the reason it's back is because of the people who make it happen each week, his words were very much appreciated.


3 Ft. Gator Players--Things you should never do…EVER!! (Part 4, 5, & 6) The Gator Players decided to wrap up their night by putting all 3 of their remaining pieces together back to back to back...


Dr. Cheese performed a monologue(?) It tuned out to be more like a college professor discussing the grades from his woman studies(?) class. (Personal thought: With the first 3 skits of the evening and now this one, what is the deal with all of the professor gimmicks being used tonight? Oh well, I LIKE IT!!) he talked abou the answers that people gave in response to the female body and even picked on his prize pupil…Mr Pleviak. It seems that Tom had drawn pictures (with Crayon) on his test papers to help illustrate his points on his final exam…The pictures were funny as hell!!


Tom Pleviak then had the difficult task of containing his laughter and following up with a song that he would sing a cappella. The song was The Impossible Dream…always a delight to hear Tom sing!!


Nick Lamb came in next with A follow up Elevator Story Pete Guither had challenged him to heed his own observations from a few weeks ago about people on residence hall elevators not being social. Nick stepped up to the challenge and tried being social with people and came to report on what he had found out. Interesting observations.


Mike Schmeuck opened a surprise letter, it was from Cox Older….OOPPSS, I'm sorry, that already happened a few weeks ago (just kidding with you Mike)…this one was from Dale Stockton, professional heckler and talked about eluded to his potential return and what he has been up to since we last heard from him… his return imminent? I guess we'll wait and see…


Matt & Enrico brought us their final Silent scene of the evening…this one put 2 men at a table and removing clothing during their game of strip poker and with the stakes as high as would be decent, and after 3 minutes of poker faces, the question was asked: "Do you have any 4's?---"GO Fish"---"Damn!!"

And Scene!!


Megan Dale made her Ted debut performing a sing a cappella. For the second time this semester we heard walking in Memphis, but that's okay, because it's a great sing and Megan did a fine job on bringing it to life.


Dan followed up with a Public Service Announcement, and talked about an issue that should be very important to all of us and that is the implementation of a new holiday on the national calendar: Of course, I was talking about National Orgasm Day.


Heart and Soul was the name of the last performance piece of the night, but wasn't really a performance piece. Instead it was named for the award given out at the end of the year, called the Theatre of Ted Heart & Soul Award. The award is given to the person who most embodies what theatre of Ted should be in terms of effort, performing, supporting others and being actively involved with making Theatre of Ted better. This years winner was MATT RUSSELL. He definitely deserved it and when his name was announced, had a genuine look of surprise over the selection. He definitely earned it…he was in 3 shows this semester, and was still at every Ted (1 of only 3 people who can make that claim).



“Theatre of Ted, Enthusiastic Applause”



The running time for Theatre of Ted was 3 hours




List of Performance Pieces (in order of performance)


Faculty Jeopardy

3 Ft. Gator Players--A Lesson

Professor Johanson--The Key

An Apology

Public Service Announcement from Betsy

Shinedo Mashed Potato

3 Ft. Gator Players--Things you should never do…EVER!! (Part 1)

Matt & Enrico w/ a silent scene

Maren w/a story

Living Canvas Slide Show

What Really Happened to Walt Disney

3 Ft. Gator Players--Things you should never do…EVER!! (Part 2)

Shawn & Jenny Present--Part 2

Dr. Cheese w/a song

3 Ft. Gator Players--Things you should never do…EVER!! (Part 3)

Matt & Enrico w/a silent scene

Honduran Ophelia--Back & Better than ever!! (H-O-4.0)

Dr Cheese w/a monologue

The Impossible Dream

3 Ft. Gator Players--Things you should never do…EVER!! (Parts 4,5 & 6)

Nick w/a Follow up Elevator Story

Mike Schmeuck w/a surprise letter

Matt & Enrico w/a silent scene

Megan w/a song

Public Service Announcement from Dan

Heart & Soul


27 performance pieces this week!!! Great variety and great effort by everyone!!

Thank you all for not only a great night, but all of the effort in bring back Theatre of Ted!




Performance Piece(s) of the Week


Shinedo Mashed Potato

Faculty Jeopardy

The Living Canvas Slide Show



WoW MoM moment of the week


Matt Russell being recognized for his efforts at Ted this year and receiving the first ever Heart & Soul award.




I must admit, talking about Theatre of Ted at the end of the night and what it means to me to be a part of it was an emotional moment for me as I started to reminisce about the past few months. It has been a great privilege for me to be a part of bringing back Ted. The success has been surprising, but not unexpected, because it's all about the people who make it happen, and looking around, even before the first Ted I felt those people were around. Everyone's involvement has been greatly appreciated and hope you have enjoyed, I know I have.